I so could not be a special needs teacher

or bus driver, or aide.....Good thing I get to be the mommy.
Today when the bus came to pick up Kaden I could hear a child crying, not a bad cry, but crying nonetheless, it broke my heart :( The bus driver was doing the best he could to comfort that child as we were walking down the driveway. But the mommy in me wanted to race on that bus and hold that child and comfort them. As I am walking away from the bus after handing over my precious piece of cargo, I could hear the bus driver say ok its time to go to sleep. LOL and they were off. Hope that poor kid got to fall back asleep I think they have a pretty long ride to the next bus stop.
Its little things like that that make it so hard for me to send Kaden to school. Or like when I ask the bus driver to please make sure Kaden doesnt get too hot with the heater going plus his winter coat on because he will get car sick on them, and to see the look of panic in their eyes. Or to get a call from the nurse saying your child screamed bloody murder all the way to school and so they had her meet the bus at school to check him out....thinking they let him get too hot...just my mommy opinion. Or when the teacher calls to tell me my child has been upset all day and is there anything I can do to fix it. Well no there isnt anything I can do while he he is in your care. Its out of my hands, I hate having him in the care of another. They dont know him like I do. When you get these calls it breaks your heart and you want to run to the school or the bus and rip your child from them and never return them. Or maybe thats just me. BUT I know he needs to be at school. I know he is learning and making amazing leaps and bounds. He is making new noises that are starting to sound more like words. He is doing wonderful with his PECS. (A picture way of communicating) In fact we have to have a new IEP to help set new goals for him in Jan...Right before we leave, but he should be able to go into his new school with a new set of goals. And I know it will be hard to see him struggle to get into a new routine at a new school. But these little mile stones make it all worth it in the end.
Some would say he is spoiled, or I dont work had enough with him. But I dont believe that is true. You want to know how I know? Kaden will only sign for his family. His teachers have no idea nor have they seen his signing. Kaden has just recently started giving kisses ON HIS OWN. No more chasing him down to love on him. he comes to me and when we are walking somewhere and he id holding my hand and presses his lips to my arm, its not just to wipe his nose anymore. He LOVES me. I have seen him go up to his brothers and sisters and hug them and giggle when they hug him back. He is loved, he feels safe enough to let down some walls. And while he can not talk and tell me he loves me, I know he does and I know he feels the love we all have for him.
Anywho, my point is I could never be his teacher...I know what he wants and it frustrates me to no end to have to fight with him about grabbing the card off the chart before giving it to him and he knows I will give in after a bit. I couldnt be the bus driver we would never make it to school because I would want to pull over and snuggle every upset child :) I couldnt be the aide for the same reason I couldnt be the teacher. But I am so very grateful I get to be the mommy.

Sorry another Kaden post I know. But it was on my mind this morning and I had time before it was time to wake up the next round of school goers. Time to get them up! Have a great day all! :)
~care